When I go to my pics In Camera, I see a Send option on the bottom left of the screen. Any there for you? Or, after you place a check mark in the pic, you can use the Options and choose upload.
As far as your data cable question, I have searched for one also and cannot find one. I find ones online that SAY that they fit the 3100, but when I get them, the piece does not seat in to the phone correctly. It fits, but does not click in, and does not work. Looks just like the charger, but no go. Hope that helps.